Friday, November 21, 2008

So this is what we've been waiting for?

Since this is my first blog, I will start off by introducing myself. My name is Courtney, I am originally from Connecticut, but attending school in New Jersey. Check out the picture if you would like to know how I look, but then again, isn't personality suppose to be what really matters? I'm sure.

Anyway, college, first semester, big changes. I'm not exactly a psychology major, though it is a possibility, but I have found a great deal of commonalities among students here. So, yea, college. The golden escape for all pissed off high school teens to a land of partying, hott frat guys, and their path to fame and fortune. Ha, right. I'm currently a little three quarters through my first semester. Now, I'm an outgoing person, one who was described as "intense" the first time my neighbor met me at an orientation event. Apparently a loud outgoing crazy person with short purple hair is intense. Who woulda thunk?

So, college, not what I thought. At least this one isn't. I expected opportunity the minute I walked in, options left and right, a fresh start, groups of people I could interact and become best friends with. Instead I have found myself in an overnight high school with more alcohol and stupidity. Even the seniors here have questionable drama. Maybe it's my school, overrated by a GREAT deal, but I feel this place isn't what anyone expected. Although I am most likely transferring next year to some other school. Though schools may be good and bad, when it comes to personable experiences, I find many freshman dealing with the same typical issues.

Everyone is changing, everyone is trying to be better than they actually are. Some girls are being laughed at for their high school tendencies, but they have only had a summer, those people can't change that fast. I however, look around at the chaos and become interested. The kid who came here for acting, only to be building sets, the one who came for education, and can't take the classes on their own campus. Many of the people here know what they want to do, and are changing their person. Yes, I am changing too, but I'm basically the same person, and a pretty awesome one at that I might add. I have huge dreams for myself, I want to change the world, or at least affect it in some sort of positive manner. How? No clue.

I'm not sure if anyone else can see it this way, but what will you do when you get out of college? Other than the typical teacher, lawyer, doctor, what will you do? Take that marketing degree to Crest Toothpaste, or to Sony Records? Work from home with the family, or travel do a different state each week for presentations. I don't see myself settling down exactly. Love, sure, but I want a career. It's not so much to see my name in lights, but when I die, I want one person, just one, to think of me at my wake, and be thankful and happy for the way I changed their life.

People here change you, can't deny it. My roommate and I are polar opposites. I'm an "in your face" outgoing dancing singing football watching rugby playing laughing crazy intense soft romantic girl with an "I don't give a fuck what you think about me" attitude. She is a tiny health impaired nervous crying shy stressed i care too much little person. We have a lot in common with certain things, but are sort of ying and yang like. The first weekend here there were about six girls in my little dorm room. Doing make-up, hair, trying on different outfits, yelling, dancing, etc. Now don't get me wrong I get ready girl-ish, just faster. But DAMN they were nuts, I had to step back because of the chaos, but I adjusted. (I'm more guy-girl, only hung with about two or three girls in high school, watch Sydney White). My roommate dealt with the same kind of shock when the first Steeler game of the season came on. GO PALOMALU!. Also, the first time she pissed me off, i told her, just saying, shut up your pissing me off. Apparently girls aren't straightforward.

Hm, I have gone off on different topics, and this is not what my entry was suppose to be about. But it works, the point is, people in college are halfway into the real world. High school we are protected, college is like jumping off that ledge, a little rope holding you up, desperately swinging toward the real world, with the pit of death below you. It's chaotic, it's not what you thought, it's exciting, and overall, it's unreal, but I can't wait to see what happens next.

peace, love, & koalas.